Love:Nothing
by Zoyciteyouma
Summary: It starts as a friendly tennis exposition, but Princess Peach finds herself being bullied on her own turf by someone she's never even heard of. Sometimes people can be cruel just for the sake of it.


_I've always thought the Mario-verse could use a 'bully' princess character (a Wapeach if you will). I'm offering that up in what is meant to read as the opening cut scene of a videogame that will never be made. Treat this as everything that happens between the time you press START and the time you begin controlling a character._

Morning at the Mushroom Kingdom. The stands around the royal tennis court are packed with Toads, Piantas, Bob-ombs, and every other creature that could make it to the exposition.

Princess Peach steps out of her castle, racquet in hand, and onto the court to the cheers of her audience. She passes by the Mario Brothers who are on the court level, calling her name. She blows them a kiss and waves to the crowd, assuming her corner spot for the match. On the other side, Toadette skips out, wielding a racquet almost as big as she is, and is greeted with applause as she springs into a pirouette.

"Good luck!" Peach calls, and Toadette giggles. Peach serves. It's a close match. Toadette is fast, but Peach has more control over the ball. In the end, the princess takes the match. Toadette has a moment where she clearly feels down about the result, but the sight of Peach scurrying over to her with cries of "Nice game!" instantly cheer her up. Toadette hops into Peach's arms, who lifts her up like she was actually the winner, and they revel in the praise of the audience together.

From there, Peach has a series of matches where she easily dominates the points. Yoshi makes a last ditch attempt to defend the winning point with a tongue catch, but the ball is out of reach. Petey Piranha swings so wildly he spins in two rotations before collapsing in dizziness. And Waluigi simply throws his racquet down and jumps on it. The crowd is frenzied with excitement and Peach can't help but feel a warm glow from how on a roll she is.

"New challenger!" calls the announcer. Out steps a player nobody has seen before. She's Peach's height, build, and template, but the signature color of her tennis outfit is green. Her hair is silvery with tinges of purple, and a small crown balances in precision on her head, signifying her to also be a princess. The announce continues. "Pennyroyal!"

The fans in the bleachers welcome her with a round of applause, but she pays them no mind as she assumes her place on the court. Peach wishes her the best of luck. Penny doesn't respond, she only watches Peach's movements. Peach serves.

Penny gets under the ball easily and backhands it into a light volley. Peach dashes to the net and returns the ball. Penny takes position, springs into the air and overhands the ball right at Peach's face. Peach dodges, and the ball bounces off the court and into the stands. Peach can't help but be impressed. "Good shot," she says. Penny seems not to have even heard her. Love-Fifteen.

Peach serves again. Penny repeats the same tactic, forcing Peach to the net. Peach returns the volley and plants her feet for the impact of Penny's overhand. Penny fakes the downswing and instead sends the ball to the left, well out of reach. Peach can only watch it go. Love-Thirty.

Pennyroyal is serving. Peach easily receives the ball, sending it to the backcourt opposite from where Penny started to keep her moving. Penny sends the ball to the center of Peach's side. Peach lobs the ball back at an angle that Penny is ready for. She gently taps the ball almost right at the net, forcing Peach to dive for the save. From there it's an easy smash to the backcourt. For the first time in the game, Pennyroyal gives Peach a noticeable smirk. Love-Forty.

The crowd has gotten quieter. It's apparent that Pennyroyal is deliberately using dirty tactics on the court. Peach receives the ball again and sends it to the back, trying to keep Penny away from the net. Penny blocks it and sends the ball to the left. Peach guesses correctly and gets in position first. The ball hits the court behind Penny's position, who has to rescue it while running away from the net. She swings up, knocking the ball behind her, giving Peach plenty of time to choose her offense. Light envelops the ball, making it impossible to see. Its shadow appears near Penny who makes her best estimation. She's wrong. Hearts rise from where the ball impacts and vanish. Fifteen-Forty. The crowd cheers.

Peach serves. Penny returns. Peach backhands and Penny gets control of the court, bringing the fight to the net again. Peach-Penny-Peach-Penny, no sound except the poor ball being pummeled. Back and forth it goes, changing sides ten times. Twelve. Fourteen. Sixteen. By the time it crosses into the twenties it's a new Mushroom Kingdom record. In a moment of blind luck, Peach swings at an awkward angle , sending the ball higher than Penny was expecting. Penny overhands, missing the ball and bouncing the racquet off the net. Her racquet hits the ball on the upswing sending it out of bounds. For a few seconds, nobody is sure what just happened, but after a look at the replay Peach is awarded the point. The crowd screams. Thirty-Forty.

Penny is visibly frustrated as her one-point-shy-of-winning is in danger of tying the score. Peach serves and she returns it, moving closer to the net. Peach pushes her back. She returns another volley and approaches the center, only to have to retreat again. One more attempt to rush the net is foiled and she has to send the ball right back to Peach in a conveniently high arc. This is clearly the last straw.

Pennyroyal's racquet begins to glow. Her eyes focus on Princess Peach like crosshairs and she hurls the racquet horizontally across the court. The net catches it, but the force of Penny's heave draws it back like a bowstring.

Peach is focused on the incoming tennis ball and doesn't notice the racquet flying right towards her face. SMASH. Peach flies backwards and collapses to the ground. Penny's racquet boomerangs back into her hand. The ball bounces in bounds. Then out.

Peach stares at Penny from across the court, still stunned from the face plant. Penny smiles with satisfaction and strikes a mock Peach pose. "Oh, did you lose?" she says. Then the tears well up. Peach covers her face and runs back to her castle.

For the first time in the Mushroom Kingdom's history a crowd of spectators begins booing a competitor. The Mario Brothers decide to run after Peach to see badly hurt she is, leaving Pennyroyal to face the audience.

Strangely though, the more the crowd shouts at her, the more Pennyroyal seems to enjoy it. She basks in the negativity, only making the audience angrier and only continuing to feed off it. "Thank you!" she yells, mimicking the way Peach had greeted them earlier that morning. She folds her hands in mock femininity and fluffs out her hair, giggling a falsetto 'Tee-hee'.

Voices begin calling for her removal from the court and from the Kingdom itself, to which she responds with a false look of concern. "Oh my," she gasps, pretending to feel threatened. She calls for Mario to save her, promising to bake him a delicious cake while her Kingdom falls apart or her castle gets stolen off the ground. And convinced that her point has been made, Pennyroyal takes a grand bow to a small shower of crushed cans and hammers thrown in her direction.

She straightens back up to give one final wave when a loud bang of something striking something else echoes over the crowd. A tennis ball hits the crown on her head with pinpoint accuracy, knocking it off and sending it out of sight.

Silence falls over the crowd. For a moment Pennyroyal can only feel around on the top of her head for the crown that is no longer there. Her smugness is replaced by fury. She turns to face the individual so audacious as to violate the sanctity of lineage.

The culprit stands firm, undeterred by Penny's death glare. She steps onto the playing field, racquet securely in hand, and takes over Peach's spot in front of the castle.

"Hi," she says, a cold exterior holding back the wildfire in her eyes. "I'm Daisy."


End file.
